Lorna Jeanne Dudash

This month, we’re highlighting a heroine who shined a light of her own, albeit inadvertently, on the plight of lonely, 40-something women in America. Her desperate actions have garnered the attention of many people, thus revealing the truth about horny, middle-aged MILFs.It all started near Portland, Oregon when a Washington County Sheriff’s deputy responded to a noise complaint called in by the neighbors of Lorna Jeanne Dudash. The deputy went to Dudash’s residence, knocked on the door, and then left. According to the police, Dudash then called 911, requesting that the “cutie pie” cop go back to her place.Dudash told the emergency dispatcher, “He’s the cutest cop I’ve ever seen in a long time. I just want to know his name.” We strongly suspect that she actually wanted to get to know more about him than just his name. Dudash continued, “Heck, it doesn’t come very often a good man comes to your doorstep.”When the dispatcher asked Dudash why she needed the deputy to return, she replied, “Honey, I’m just going to be honest with you, OK? I just thought he was cute. I’m 45 years old, and I’d just like to meet him again, but I don’t know how to go about doing that without calling 911.”

She then asked the operator, “If you would give the officer my phone number and ask him to come back, would you mind?”

This just goes to show that what is portrayed on shows like Desperate Housewives is far from reality. Unlike the women of Wisteria Lane, most women like Dudash donÂ’t live on a street chock-full of hunky, unfaithful husbands at the ready to sleep with them.

When the deputy did return, he determined that her horniness was the only emergency. He then arrested her for misusing the 911 system.

We believe this is shameful! While some say that Dudash should be punished for abusing the 911 emergency system, the duty of the police is to protect and to serve, and this woman obviously was in need of some servicing. Even if the cop was unable to comply because he was already spoken for, the least he could have done was pick up a pack of fresh batteries for her horny ass.

As a 45-year-old, fairly attractive woman, Dudash has probably been to numerous bachelorette parties with male strippers dressed as policemen. Suddenly, one lonely night, she answered her door, only to discover a cop who looked like a male stripper. What did you expect her to do? Hell, the cop is lucky he didn’t have to beat her off of him, although she probably wouldn’t have minded a good pounding from his “nightstick.”