LSU Student: “I Bought These Faggy Glasses so I Could Start Blogging”

A sophomore at LSU with perfect vision said he bought a pair of obnoxious, horned-rim glasses strictly so he could appear to be a bona fide blogger.

hipsterglassesJames Bollard said he bought the glasses last month after finally deciding to start a blog.

“All my friends have blogs and I didn’t,” Bollard said. “We’d get together at Highland Coffees, and they’d spend the whole time on their Macbooks, posting entries while I sat there like an idiot just wanting to talk. I know; I’m such a weirdo.”

Bollard said he purchased the spectacles before launching his blog, in an attempt to attain an air of legitimacy in the blogosphere.


“It seems like bloggers are like piano players,” Bollard explained. “The best ones are usually visually impaired.”

“I’m kind of new to this, but it seems like bloggers are like piano players,” Bollard explained. “The best ones are usually visually impaired.”

Bollard continued, “It’s like, in order to have a big following, you have to look super-studious, like Ira Glass or something. It’s not like I need them, since I have 20/20 vision, but I bought these faggy glasses so I could start blogging like the rest of my friends.”

Since purchasing the Buddy Holly-style glasses, Bollard said, he’s been steadily blogging about indie music, skinny jeans, and irony.