Bowling for Dollars

Yes, itÂ’s my favorite time of the year. No, not the holiday season, full of love and joy and relatives; IÂ’m talking about the college bowl season. With 33 bowl games now being played in Division I-A, some of the bowls are picking some interesting names for the games, and some even weirder corporate sponsorships. Here are just some of my favoritesÂSan Diego County Credit Union® Poinsettia Bowl – December 19, 2006, 7pm, San Diego, CAThis bowl game is the winner of the most ghetto name in bowls for 2006-2007. This award is brought to you locally by the North Baton Rouge and Livingston Parish Mobile Home Cooperative for a “Ghetto” Tomorrow.PAPAJOHNS.COM BOWL – December 23, 2006, 12pm, Birmingham, ALWow, itÂ’s great to see the “mafia” finally getting involved in collegiate athletics!New Mexico Bowl – December 23, 2006, 3:30pm, Albuquerque, NM I wonder if the new Spanish version of the national anthem will be played before kickoff?PetroSun Independence Bowl – December 28, 2006, 2:30pm, Shreveport, LA.I love how the oil and gas industry comes to Louisiana, takes our precious fossil fuels and sells them back to us at a higher cost, then, for the icing on the cake, names the most mediocre bowl game in history in its honor.Pacific Life Holiday Bowl® – December 28, 2006, 7pm, San Diego, CA.IÂ’m sure that all the illegal immigrants in San Diego charity hospitals would love to have some Pacific Life coverage this holiday season.

Gaylord Hotels™ Music City Bowl™ – December 29, 2006, 12pm, Nashville, TN

Do I really need to point it out? Any bowl with the name Gaylord in it is just lame. Shame on you, Nashville, shame on you!

AutoZone® Liberty Bowl – December 29, 2006, 3:30pm, Memphis, TN

This bowl is strictly for rednecks. Nothing says “redneck” like “Liberty” and spending days fixing your truck with parts from AutoZone.

Insight® Bowl – December 29, 2006, 4:30pm, Tempe, AZ

Yeah, what great insight you will receive in this bowl. “Hey Coach, your team finished barely above .500 and you’re now on the hot seat; way to go.”

Chick-fil-A® Bowl – December 30, 2006, 7pm, Atlanta, GA

This is the perfect sponsor for the former Peach Bowl, because we all know how health-conscious Chick-fil-A is when it comes to their menu.

Capital One Bowl – January 1, 2007, 12pm, Orlando, FL

We here in Baton Rouge are just now getting to know Capital One really well. I think it should be called the “Hibernia Bank Employees Pink Slip Bowl.”

GMAC Bowl – January 7, 2007, 7pm, Mobile, AL

Now this is a bowl that I can feel. Who wouldnÂ’t like to play in the G-MAC Bowl? We all know that all those players want to be Gs and Macks. So foÂ’ shizzle my nizzle, IÂ’ll be sure to catch this game at the Players Ball Club on Airline Highway