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So, I learned a fun new game to play with my brain today. I had some chewing gum that I'd been chewing – some of the cheap stuff that loses its flavor after about three seconds. It had, predictably, done so. Hence, I was considering getting rid of it.My first notion was to spit it out into the trash. So, I leaned over and was about to do so, when it struck me that the can in question had no bag liner. I wouldn't really be throwing my gum away – I'd be depositing it for future generations of scientists to study in its petrified state.This seemed bad.

So, the wife has been in business for herself going on a year now, and while it's been a success, I have noticed a few changes that have gone along with it. For one thing, there's the whole "She's a Very Important Person" thing I tease her about on occasion – the way her moving and shaking means that she sometimes gets quite offended if I suggest that she could go without her cell phone for a few hours, or that she doesn't really have to check her email during sex.I don't mind, as it's all made her very happy.

Happy New Year, everybody! Hopefully, if you made a New Year’s resolution, you haven’t already broken it, although chances are, you probably have by now. Either way, I’m sure nearly everyone is glad to see 2005 go into the history books.As for us, we at Red Shtick Magazine have made a resolution, too. As you probably know, for nearly two years, we’ve been the proverbial Evinrude® in a cesspool. This year, though, we plan to crank up that puppy to the red line!

I know this is showing my age, but when I was attending LSU, there was a bar in Tigerland called Sports Illustrated (where Reggie’s is today) that was the destination of many classmates on Thursday afternoon. What was so “special” about Thursdays there? Why, it was none other than perhaps the greatest drink “special” ever known to man: “Beat the Clock.”Starting at about 4pm (or whenever it was they opened) on Thursdays, certain drinks would be priced at some ridiculously low price, like around a quarter, as I recall it.

CNNÂ’s Anderson Cooper has apparently taken it upon himself to keep New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin (and the rest of the cityÂ’s leaders) honest and accountable for the billions of dollars of federal aid that have been pouring in since Hurricane Katrina. Recently, he was back in the Big Easy to follow up on NaginÂ’s progress in fulfilling his promises to rebuild the city and to ensure that the American taxpayersÂ’ money isnÂ’t being squandered.Too bad he couldnÂ’t make a similar visit to the State Capitol during the most recent legislative session.

You may not be aware of this, but when we first launched Red Shtick Magazine over two and a half years ago, our premier issue coincided with the Spanish Town Mardi Gras parade. This was not happenstance: We deliberately hurried our launch date so that the first issue came out on the same weekend.

In case you missed it, we had an election. We voted on secretary of state, insurance commissioner, and thirteen constitutional amendments. There were also some local issues, too.I know you probably had more important things to worry about, like going to the LSU or Southern game, clearing out your email, or cleaning the lint from your navel. In any case, not too many people cared enough to go vote. More specifically, only about 20% of the state’s 2.9 million voters showed up, according to the secretary of state’s office.

If you’re ever in Chicago’s North Side and feel the urge for a cup of joe in a quiet atmosphere, be sure to go to A Taste of Heaven café.

Our hero this month is a former professional football player who became an agent for the Drug Enforcement Agency. Unlike former Dallas Cowboy Nate Newton, Lee Paige, who played for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, decided to fight drugs after retirement rather than sell them.Recently, PaigeÂ’s fame as a DEA agent has far surpassed any that he experienced while playing in the NFL.

Whenever we at Red Shtick comment on the actions of a political body, typically weÂ’re slamming them for doing something idiotic. In this case, however, weÂ’ve learned about a group of city leaders who have actually done something brave and driven by common sense.