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IsnÂ’t His Hair Gray Enough Already?

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CNNÂ’s Anderson Cooper has apparently taken it upon himself to keep New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin (and the rest of the cityÂ’s leaders) honest and accountable for the billions of dollars of federal aid that have been pouring in since Hurricane Katrina. Recently, he was back in the Big Easy to follow up on NaginÂ’s progress in fulfilling his promises to rebuild the city and to ensure that the American taxpayersÂ’ money isnÂ’t being squandered.Too bad he couldnÂ’t make a similar visit to the State Capitol during the most recent legislative session.

What the Flock Are They Thinking?

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You may not be aware of this, but when we first launched Red Shtick Magazine over two and a half years ago, our premier issue coincided with the Spanish Town Mardi Gras parade. This was not happenstance: We deliberately hurried our launch date so that the first issue came out on the same weekend.

I Feel So Dirty

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In case you missed it, we had an election. We voted on secretary of state, insurance commissioner, and thirteen constitutional amendments. There were also some local issues, too.I know you probably had more important things to worry about, like going to the LSU or Southern game, clearing out your email, or cleaning the lint from your navel. In any case, not too many people cared enough to go vote. More specifically, only about 20% of the state’s 2.9 million voters showed up, according to the secretary of state’s office.

Dan McCauley

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If you’re ever in Chicago’s North Side and feel the urge for a cup of joe in a quiet atmosphere, be sure to go to A Taste of Heaven café.

Lee Paige

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Our hero this month is a former professional football player who became an agent for the Drug Enforcement Agency. Unlike former Dallas Cowboy Nate Newton, Lee Paige, who played for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, decided to fight drugs after retirement rather than sell them.Recently, PaigeÂ’s fame as a DEA agent has far surpassed any that he experienced while playing in the NFL.

Scottsdale, AZ City Council

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Whenever we at Red Shtick comment on the actions of a political body, typically weÂ’re slamming them for doing something idiotic. In this case, however, weÂ’ve learned about a group of city leaders who have actually done something brave and driven by common sense.

Lorna Jeanne Dudash

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This month, weÂ’re highlighting a heroine who shined a light of her own, albeit inadvertently, on the plight of lonely, 40-something women in America. Her desperate actions have garnered the attention of many people, thus revealing the truth about horny, middle-aged MILFs.It all started near Portland, Oregon when a Washington County SheriffÂ’s deputy responded to a noise complaint called in by the neighbors of Lorna Jeanne Dudash. The deputy went to DudashÂ’s residence, knocked on the door, and then left.

Houston, TX

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Some environmental experts claim that part of Baton Rouge’s air problems can be attributed to ozone from Houston carried here by air currents. We’re not sure if they’re feeling guilty about helping us reach non-attainment status, but lately they’ve been doing some huge favors for the folks in the Bayou State.Everyone knows how Houston took in so many evacuees after Katrina. Some reports say that at least 250,000 people from New Orleans were welcomed into the city.

Plan B from Outer Space

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Once upon a time, March was the first month of the year, and it was dedicated to Mars, the god of war, signaling that the holidays were over and it was time to get up and go aÂ’killing once again. Now itÂ’s dedicated to St. Patrick, warning any future saints that if you do anything of note in Ireland, theyÂ’re gonna drink on your birthday.St. PatÂ’s is on a Friday this year, which means the majority of you wonÂ’t have to work the next day, which means youÂ’ll probably overdo it again this year. Well, fear not! Your Uncle Knick is here to help you out.

¡Se Habla Liberty!

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Hey folks! ItÂ’s July, and once again, itÂ’s time to celebrate Thomas Jefferson taking time off from his black slave girlfriend to write up the Declaration of Independence. Even though he was the best writer the First Continental Congress had to offer, it still took 86 adjustments to the document before it was deemed ready to present to giddy King George, proving that Jefferson was, in fact, the first real American. So live it up in true American style with hot dogs from the Germans, beer from the Czechs, and fireworks from the Chinese.

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